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our final moments as a trio 

7/1/2015

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Picture
Photo courtesy of Crista Ballard Photography 
Originally published in the July 2015 edition of 605 Magazine

At the time of this writing, I am a mere seven days away from meeting our new baby boy. This will be our second child, our first boy, and our first baby we were able to carry to full term. To say we are wildly excited would be a gross understatement, but as we have reached these last several days of waiting we also find ourselves … wildly bored out of our minds and beyond ready to look upon the face of our baby boy.


While I consider myself Procrastinator Extraordinaire — to the point I should probably list it on my resume under “Skills” -- preparing for this baby I have been body snatched and transformed into Patty Prepared. The nursery was done weeks ago. I planted my garden. Blankets have been folded and refolded. All baby gear has been purchased and stored and to top it off, I even started sewing. People, that’s how real it is: I’m so bored that I am sewing. I’ve sewn curtains, baby things, baby blankets, and I was just looking at a Youtube tutorial on how to make a tie for my dog.

I know what you’re thinking. And I know. I don’t even know myself anymore either.

Then, of course there is the cleaning. I feel like I have been reduced to a cleaning robot. In efforts to provide a sterile environment for a newborn, I feel like almost every moment of my day involves some sort of tidying. But, I have to to tell you, it’s the damndest thing: While I keep cleaning, these people I live with! They just keep eating. They keep wearing clothes. They keep dropping stuff on the floor. And with a gigantic baby subsiding directly in my abdominal cavity, at this point if it’s on the floor, it might as well be in Cuba because this pregnant gal can’t pick anything up.  It’s almost as if nesting has become futile because the nesting efforts are constantly being undermined by a toddler, a dog, and a grown man.
Thus, in these last days, I’ve given up on the cleaning aspect. My mother arrives tomorrow and I will more than appreciate the extra hands and able body as my body in this state of pregnancy — well, it is just not able. So instead of cleaning, sewing, and all the other insane things I have found myself doing to pass the time these last few weeks, I have taken to just soaking up these precious moments with my daughter.

We only have seven days left together just her and I during the day so I want to truly make the most of our time. We have spent long days at the park and pool and yesterday we spent a long rainy day inside baking. Foolishly thinking baking is a good idea with a fervently independent toddler, I had grand notions of several dozen cookies and a fresh baked cake awaiting my mother when she arrived. Instead, I found my kitchen looking like a scene out of Twister with only one dozen edible cookies, a broken bowl on the floor, a scared dog cowering in the corner because of the commotion, and a half eaten cake. Sorry, Mom.

But in the end, there was my daughter: Standing on her stool wearing an apron, silly happy with chocolate smeared all over her face and extremities shouting “I can’t wait to show Daddy cookies!” This is it, I thought to myself. These are the moments I’m going to remember forever. 
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Much like my toddler, I don’t do very well with boredom. But, I could not be more thankful for these 40 weeks of grueling high-risk pregnancy. For what feels like eternity, I have prayed, hoped, and begged for a full term pregnancy and now to be so close to the finish line and to still have time to sneak in priceless memories is more than I could have ever asked for.
As long as it feels, it is obvious God knew what he was doing when he made pregnancy 40 weeks long (don’t stone me for saying so).  Not only is it the perfect amount of time for a baby to be perfectly grown, but it’s also the ideal timeframe for all of us to get our heads wrapped around the fact that we are physically bringing a baby into the world. Wild.

So, while you’re reading this and you’re making your Fourth of July plans or scheming your epic road trip to some epic adventure, think of me dear friend and any other expectant mother. Drop us a line. Because we’ll just be here; holding it down on the prairie trying to stave off anxious boredom while doing our part to populate the earth. Now, back to waiting … Seven more days …





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warm weather to-do list in south dakota 

5/1/2015

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Picture
Photo courtesy of Crista Ballard Photography 
Originally published in the May 2015 edition of 605 Magazine


Look! That thing in the sky! Yes, that blinding light gleaming like a burning ball of happiness. No, it isn’t the apocalypse, nor is it a figment of your imagination. It is, boys and girls, indeed the sun. Warmer temperatures are draped upon us and I am reminded every day the sheer wonder of this as my daughter saunters out of bed and upon looking out the window exclaims in bewilderment, “Mommy! It’s sunny day!” It is as though she also appreciates my newfound appreciation for the warm sunshine and shares my habit in quietly singing I can see clearly now the negative windchill is gone …

So, now that the sun is out and school is out, what now? What do we parents do with our little critters in this grand state of ours during this glorious summertime? Admittedly, when I first moved here and I didn’t see a mountain or a beach in sight, I felt dismay and a feeling as if I’ve been tricked. But today, I have seen the light (literally, the sun) and have a ever-growing simple to-do list of things to do this summer with children in tow. Here are my top five:

1. B&G Milkyway
Ok, so I may have mentioned that I’m pregnant so it may not be a coincidence that the first thing on this list involves food. But summer to me has come to mean sunset nights at this darling, local, Sioux Falls legendary ice cream shop with my little family. And what better reason to eat naughty fudge covered ice cream than the sun being out; can I get an amen? And with winter illnesses hopefully behind us for now, I don’t mind letting the littles (and the canine) indulge in a good old-fashioned sugar induced brain freeze. By the way, to all of you I see in the Dairy Queen drive-thru and not in the B&G line, I just want you to know; you’re making a grave error! Get out of there immediately.

2. Lake time
I have discovered that half of this town is gone during the winter (snow birding, you lucky devils) and during the summer the other half is gone lake housing (again, you lucky devils). Last summer, we hopped on the bandwagon and put in some serious lake time at a couple of the surrounding lakes in the area and our minds were blown. We did not know how much we were missing out on. So, this year we hope to bribe more of our friends to take us. Although, we come with a hyper toddler, a giant dog, and this year hopefully with a newborn. Any takers? All jokes aside, getting out to a body of water even if just for the day is like Christmas for kids of all ages and a must-do on our summer fun list.

3. Sioux Falls Parks and Rec Activities

When I first moved here and knew close to no one, I loved pulling out my little Parks and Rec Activities guide and migrating toward activities and events age appropriate for my daughter. Two years later, I still love going to the little play times that they offer at parks across the city as they really do a fabulous job in making summertime fun with the children and it provides a great way to meet new parents! And, secretly, the way I see it, if my daughter acts up and acts like a maniac, oh well! No one knows us! Anonymity can often be golden currency while raising a toddler.  

4. Wall Drug

I steer us west for a mere moment because let’s face it, the west side of this state got the lionshare of the beauty in this state and we gotta show the west side some love! Think: Black Hills, Missouri River, Spearfish Canyon, etc. The problem is, although the drive is relatively short from the east side to say the Black Hills, I have found it does not feel short when you have needy, darling children in the backseat requesting something every nanosecond. However, I have found the holy grail of donuts that makes it worth your while and a perfect little stop for the offspring on the way to higher altitude. Wall Drug donuts, people. And I won’t stop there. Wall Drug pancakes. In the summertime, their backyard is open with lots of summertime food and happenings for the kids, so they can play and splash and mine and take pictures with jackalopes. They can even be terrified by a giant robotic T-Rex dinosaur, because who doesn’t like to see a terrified child? (Kidding). But you, faithful parent, get yourself to the donut counter line and get a maple donut. Bring one back for me. I’ll be your pregnant best friend.

5. Naps and Bubbles
Summer is also a time for simplicity in my book. A time to take a break from routines and schedules and let the day unfold lazily with a cool breeze. Thus, I plan to take lots of naps and play in the swirling bubbles with my imaginative daughter. Just merely visiting our backyard is a magical field trip to her and it has truly made me stop and take notice that we don’t have to go anywhere or do anything to find beauty. There are so many tiny, beautiful things to notice and savor. Like the green grass, the blue sky, and the mere certainty that the sun is in fact above us in all of its life-giving glory.
​

Happy warm temperatures to all of you, may there be adventure and rest (and donuts and ice cream) in the sunny days to come.

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making room for a new addition

4/21/2015

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Picture
Photo courtesy of Crista Ballard Photography 

This article was originally published in the April 2015 edition of 605 Magazine. 

Spring is always that time of year where our winter oppressed bodies comes out of deep hiding and we unabashedly expose our sun-deprived faces to the world in an act of utter jubilee. In addition to the weeping of joy that takes place once winter is over, spring is also a time where many take to the mop, the rags, the bleach, and channel their inner Cinderella servant self and involve themselves in what has become known as their annual spring cleaning.

And then, of course, there are people like me.

Who, at the first scent of spring, run frantically to the windows, throw them open with wild abandon, lay in the sun, and dream of fresh gardens and golden tans. Leaving any conscious thought of being in the house another second after a cruel winter 
-- let alone cleaning said house -- far behind.

However, this spring is different for our little family. You see, a blessing blew down from heaven itself and we are expecting a baby boy in June. (Insert wild, off-beat, embarrassing, happy dance here.) So, with a pending arrival of another tiny human, I have gone against the grain of my character and decided to try to do a little intensive organization and spring cleaning of my own. Or, as some others may call it, nesting.

We didn’t get the chance to prepare, clean, or nest when our first child came because she made her two-pound debut 10 weeks early. Thus, we were immediately hurled into the throes of parenthood and hospital stays and the very last thing I had time to think about was organizing baby socks, cleaning the carpet, or even putting a nursery together. And while we are praying and hoping this time will be different, we realize there is a chance we could find ourselves there again. So, to alleviate a bit of pressure I used spring as a good excuse to get the house ready in anticipation of our baby boy.

And, what have I learned from this idea of spring cleaning? Well, fellow spring citizens, tidying off any remnant of the harsh winter is no simple affair. I ended up consulting the Google about what sorts of activities are included in a regular spring cleaning and I came upon a list compiled by Martha Stewart entitled “Spring-Cleaning Checklist.” And I’m here to tell you, I’m sorry, but Martha has gone and lost her mind. The checklist is three pages long, small print. THREE pages. And as if that isn’t crazy enough, they list eight steps to achieve perfectly clean windows. Eight steps. And for good measure, they also throw in how to clean all the grout in your house.

I quickly shut my computer after I read that list. First of all, what happened to just wiping your windows down with Windex? And second of all, I’m not entirely confident I can identify what grout even is in my house. Sigh. It is no wonder I have avoided this seasonal cleanse my whole life.

Now to those of you who love this type of extremely thorough house purification, I hope you don’t hear me judging you. Because, well …  baby, you’re a firework. I’m jealous that you have that work ethic in you and wish I had it in me to locate grout, scrub it, and wax it until it sparkles. Unfortunately, I just don’t have it in me. So, I have just pretended Martha’s exhaustive three-page list does not exist and I have been focusing my energy on things like sifting through old baby gear and seeing what I can use again, hiring painters to paint the new nursery, and trying to get my three-year-old to understand the change that is brewing in our little house. And now … I’m exhausted.

My spring cleaning list may be small, but I feel enormously accomplished in getting to do any sort of preparation at all this time around. And, as any parent can attest, anything can happen on this wild ride to bringing a human into the world, so while the sun is shining, the baby is kicking, and the carpets are cleaned, I’m just going to soak up the springtime sunshine and leave the intense cleaning for another season (or decade).

Happy cleaning!


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