Little Parent on the Prairie
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finding home

1/1/2017

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Picture
Image credit: Crista Ballard Photography
Originally published in the
January 2017 edition of 605 Magazine

It was getting late as I blinked my eyes and strained to look at the unfamiliar road signs. Will this drive ever end? It had been a long day of driving; several stops to change diapers, mind-numbing children’s songs, and loud panting from our dog. We were all feeling extremely ready to be out of the car and at our destination.

Our destination? Here, South Dakota. This was the road trip that marked the life-altering move from Denver, Colorado. Our belongings had gone on ahead of us in a giant moving truck, and we followed a few days behind. We broke the trip up to two days as we had a spirited one-year-old daughter at the time and a relatively young dog in tow. On this second day of traveling, I remember being tired, emotionally exhausted from crying (who doesn’t cry the whole way while driving through Nebraska, anyway?), and hungry. A dangerous trifecta, indeed. As we pulled into the vicinity of Sioux Falls, as luck would have it, I was the driver and my husband (the Sioux Falls native) was the trusty navigator.

“I think I know a shortcut,” my husband declared. “Get off here.”

I sighed – unwilling to get into the entirely cliché “are-you-sure-why-don’t-you-look-at-a-map” discussion – and turned on my blinker and exited the main interstate. As we drove for a few miles or so, I began to notice there were no street lights and it appeared we were on a two-lane highway of some sort. Feeling my blood pressure acutely rising, I checked in with my navigator; “Where are we? Where are we going? And … where are all the people?”

Suddenly, I felt the car lurch over an odd bump and the wheels began to bounce around erratically. What is happening? I thought as my coffee began to spatter out of its cup. Peering in my rear view mirror, I spotted a cloud of dust being kicked up from our car, and then I knew: We were on a dirt road.

“Just a couple more miles of this dirt road and we will be at the new house!” My husband joyously said in victory.

Remember that trifecta I mentioned? Being hungry, tired, and emotionally exhausted? It caught up with me right then and I admittedly burst into a dramatic sob. It was ridiculous. I sobbed.

​I sobbed because of the dirt road.


My husband knew we all wanted to get out of the car after a long drive, so the shortcut was entirely warranted. In fact, I know it saved us time. The dirt road was not his fault. But, in that moment, something about coming into our new town on a dirt road felt heartbreakingly symbolic to me. For years, I always dreamed I would end up in some place like San Diego, San Francisco, or Denver. I wanted to raise my kids in urban areas surrounded by diversity. So, when I made it to Denver and met my husband there, I thought, “I’ve found it.” I’ve finally found home. I thought the only dirt road I would ever see is a ski run in the summer. So, when my tires hit that dirt road here in South Dakota? Yah, I sobbed. I felt like I had left civilization as I knew it. And I know now how ridiculous that is, but at the time, that drive on that dirt road truly felt like a death of a dream. An end of an era.

That was several years ago now that we made that drive. It was a trip I will never forget, yet I hadn’t thought about it for quite awhile until just the other day. I was driving (again) by myself and I was on my way to a meeting at a small acreage we recently bought where we hope to move this year. It was one of those crisp blue days on the prairie, where if it wasn’t for the fact that you could see your breath in the air, you might think it was a rather warm, sunny day. As I drove, I found myself in awe of the beauty that is this place called South Dakota. The prairie looked still and peaceful. The frost on the ground added a beautiful sparkle to everything it touched. The countless old trees seemed to nod politely while saying “Howdy Ma’am.” The sky seemed so big I felt like I could see all the way to Denver. And it dawned on me that for maybe the first time in a long time, I didn’t want to be in Denver. Or California. Or anywhere else. I wanted to be here. I felt myself thanking God for bringing me here all those years ago and right when I was doing that, I felt the familiar feeling as my car lurched over an odd bump. I felt my tires bounce around erratically and I saw my coffee begin to spatter out of my cup.

I was driving on a dirt road again.

I smiled. I’ve driven on that dirt road countless times since we bought the acreage, but I hadn’t thought about it in context of when I first drove on dirt road in South Dakota all those years ago until right then. It was as if God was calling my attention to the irony. I laughed at myself as I remembered sobbing uncontrollably as I drove on that dirt road into town all those years ago. Who would’ve thought that years later, I would be thankful, giddy even, as I drove on another strikingly similar dirt road. And then I had the jarring thought, that perhaps that first dirt road didn’t so much symbolize the death of a dream afterall, but really the birth of new, unexpected, and bigger dreams.

As we all charge into this new year, I pray that God would do the same for you this year that He did, and continues to do, for me: To show you the unexpected blessing and opportunity on your own proverbial “dirt roads.” And wherever there is a death of a dream, that the birth of new dream would be joyously revealed.

Cheers!​
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warm weather to-do list in south dakota 

5/1/2015

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Picture
Photo courtesy of Crista Ballard Photography 
Originally published in the May 2015 edition of 605 Magazine


Look! That thing in the sky! Yes, that blinding light gleaming like a burning ball of happiness. No, it isn’t the apocalypse, nor is it a figment of your imagination. It is, boys and girls, indeed the sun. Warmer temperatures are draped upon us and I am reminded every day the sheer wonder of this as my daughter saunters out of bed and upon looking out the window exclaims in bewilderment, “Mommy! It’s sunny day!” It is as though she also appreciates my newfound appreciation for the warm sunshine and shares my habit in quietly singing I can see clearly now the negative windchill is gone …

So, now that the sun is out and school is out, what now? What do we parents do with our little critters in this grand state of ours during this glorious summertime? Admittedly, when I first moved here and I didn’t see a mountain or a beach in sight, I felt dismay and a feeling as if I’ve been tricked. But today, I have seen the light (literally, the sun) and have a ever-growing simple to-do list of things to do this summer with children in tow. Here are my top five:

1. B&G Milkyway
Ok, so I may have mentioned that I’m pregnant so it may not be a coincidence that the first thing on this list involves food. But summer to me has come to mean sunset nights at this darling, local, Sioux Falls legendary ice cream shop with my little family. And what better reason to eat naughty fudge covered ice cream than the sun being out; can I get an amen? And with winter illnesses hopefully behind us for now, I don’t mind letting the littles (and the canine) indulge in a good old-fashioned sugar induced brain freeze. By the way, to all of you I see in the Dairy Queen drive-thru and not in the B&G line, I just want you to know; you’re making a grave error! Get out of there immediately.

2. Lake time
I have discovered that half of this town is gone during the winter (snow birding, you lucky devils) and during the summer the other half is gone lake housing (again, you lucky devils). Last summer, we hopped on the bandwagon and put in some serious lake time at a couple of the surrounding lakes in the area and our minds were blown. We did not know how much we were missing out on. So, this year we hope to bribe more of our friends to take us. Although, we come with a hyper toddler, a giant dog, and this year hopefully with a newborn. Any takers? All jokes aside, getting out to a body of water even if just for the day is like Christmas for kids of all ages and a must-do on our summer fun list.

3. Sioux Falls Parks and Rec Activities

When I first moved here and knew close to no one, I loved pulling out my little Parks and Rec Activities guide and migrating toward activities and events age appropriate for my daughter. Two years later, I still love going to the little play times that they offer at parks across the city as they really do a fabulous job in making summertime fun with the children and it provides a great way to meet new parents! And, secretly, the way I see it, if my daughter acts up and acts like a maniac, oh well! No one knows us! Anonymity can often be golden currency while raising a toddler.  

4. Wall Drug

I steer us west for a mere moment because let’s face it, the west side of this state got the lionshare of the beauty in this state and we gotta show the west side some love! Think: Black Hills, Missouri River, Spearfish Canyon, etc. The problem is, although the drive is relatively short from the east side to say the Black Hills, I have found it does not feel short when you have needy, darling children in the backseat requesting something every nanosecond. However, I have found the holy grail of donuts that makes it worth your while and a perfect little stop for the offspring on the way to higher altitude. Wall Drug donuts, people. And I won’t stop there. Wall Drug pancakes. In the summertime, their backyard is open with lots of summertime food and happenings for the kids, so they can play and splash and mine and take pictures with jackalopes. They can even be terrified by a giant robotic T-Rex dinosaur, because who doesn’t like to see a terrified child? (Kidding). But you, faithful parent, get yourself to the donut counter line and get a maple donut. Bring one back for me. I’ll be your pregnant best friend.

5. Naps and Bubbles
Summer is also a time for simplicity in my book. A time to take a break from routines and schedules and let the day unfold lazily with a cool breeze. Thus, I plan to take lots of naps and play in the swirling bubbles with my imaginative daughter. Just merely visiting our backyard is a magical field trip to her and it has truly made me stop and take notice that we don’t have to go anywhere or do anything to find beauty. There are so many tiny, beautiful things to notice and savor. Like the green grass, the blue sky, and the mere certainty that the sun is in fact above us in all of its life-giving glory.
​

Happy warm temperatures to all of you, may there be adventure and rest (and donuts and ice cream) in the sunny days to come.

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